What Gives You the Right?

So many people these days don't do what it takes to change where they're at financially. They boldly, with no real reason other than fear or comfort, refuse to take action or accept the opportunities that come their way. They act like they have a choice. They act like things are going to just keep falling into their laps and that their parents will never stop supplying their every need.
That is DELUSIONAL. And selfish.
What gives you (and me) the right? What makes us think we have the right to reject opportunity? To avoid risk? To avoid doing necessary things that scare us? To refuse to work harder and faster and smarter?
If you're a lay person (a man especially), married or single, it's your responsibility to take advantage of opportunities and make money. Why? Because money is a real way to contribute. To your family and to people in need.
Stuff happens. People get sick, houses burn down, storms destroy villages, children are born--What are you doing to make sure you're ready?
Money gives you options. Especially if you have a lot of it. I don't want to be stuck, scratching for a dollar, when I could be somewhere else, doing something meaningful. I'm doing what I can now to build wealth because, soon, I want to have the choice to drop everything when necessary, to go and be of service to other people--instead of being too stressed with being broke to think beyond how much money I wish I had in my wallet.
Hope that made sense.

The Art of Conquering Fear

(Me, posing with the piece I submitted to Solace. The exhibit will be up in CAHA in Agana for the entire month of May.)

I've come to notice how big of a role fear plays in our perception of what we can and cannot do or have in life. "I can't do___," someone would say to me in response to a question as to why they don't try something that might help them out in a challenging situation. "Why?" I would ask. And they would respond, "Because I'm scared of___." And then, at that point, I have to ask myself if there's any point to saying anything more.  The admission of fear is an indication of a mental block that person has already created and fortified. 

Fear isn't necessarily a bad thing. It can be, in fact, extremely useful. The other day, for example, I was giving advice to a friend, encouraging him to take on more responsibilities in his workplace. He leaned over after a few minutes and asked, "Do you ever...feel scared?" And I said, "Yes!" Instantaneously, I thought of many of the things I do and have and realized that fear had always stood between me and those things. Identifying that fear, however, is what helped me smash through my mental blocks and achieve what I've done and gain what I have.

Fear points directly at what is holding us back. It indicates your target. Attack it! Break through to a more awesome life, and stop letting fear hold you back! (Easier said than done, but, c'est la vie!). I'm dwelling on this today because I recently faced a real fear--although no one would have realized how big this fear was for me.

I participated in an art show. It could have turned out to be completely absurd. I don't paint or draw or anything like that. But I like to take pictures, and I had a nice picture that I'd taken with my phone. I had an idea involving this picture in my head, and in my head it would have stayed, had I not chosen to act. Within the span of a few days, I decided to exhibit this picture in an art show and print one of my poems over it. I didn't know exactly how I was going to do it, or how it would turn out, or how much it would cost to print, or where I could get a decent frame; but, somehow, through random conversations and fast thinking and driving around the island more than my gas tank would have liked, I managed to produce a printed and framed piece that turned out to look pretty good, even though it wasn't exactly what I'd had in my head at first.

So up the picture went, hanging on its own space at the art show, and though I felt rather proud of myself, there lingered, still, that unmistakable sensation of fear: I felt like a fraud. I was no artist. And I wasn't sure if the content of my picture and my poem would "jive" well enough with the theme of the art show (which was mothers, daughter, and victims of human sex trafficking--Heavy stuff, right?). I wasn't sure if this poem-picture mash-up would work well either. These fears had dogged me from the moment I'd decided to participate in the art show, but I'd seen the fear for what it was and broken through it as I acted on my plans.

The result? Success! I watched at the opening of the art show as people leaned in toward my simple picture and poem, read the words carefully, nodded to themselves as though they'd just received some sort of insight into life and murmured, "I like this one..." Wow. It was so gratifying. So affirming for me. I mentally thanked myself for not listening to the fearful voices in my head that had plagued me previously. There had been so many moments when I almost backed out, so many "reasons"--I was too busy, it was too last-minute, I didn't have anything to contribute. But I didn't let that get in the way, and now, I can look back with satisfaction and know that I had, in a small way, mastered the art of conquering fear. And now, since I acted on one of my creative ideas and experienced success, I feel like a whole new set of opportunities have opened up to me!

What are some situations where you had to conquer your fears? Let me know in the comments!

Q5:"(Do you have) advice for others trying to become small business owners?"

December 17, 2014 marked my first anniversary as an entrepreneur and college drop-out. I invited friends to ask me about my journey. Here is the fifth of the series of questions and my response:

Q5:"(Do you have) advice for others trying to become small business owners?"

As far as the technical side of starting certain kinds of small businesses goes, I can't help you very much on my own. I myself use a very simple business model, and I am still learning all the time about how I can work it to my advantage. Consequently, my first piece of advice would be to get help. Look around you. Do you know anyone who is running a business similar to the one you have in mind? Go to them right now and ask for a bit of their time. Schedule an appointment with them so you can ask them questions pertaining to their experience and knowledge, and don't forget to write down or record what they say. Be around people who know what they're doing, or who are figuring it out. You don't have to start from scratch. Go and learn from others. You will get untold value out of learning about the mistakes they've made, the struggles they face, and the ins and outs of the kind of businesses they're in.

Attend seminars and workshops. I attended two such events in 2014, and both were worth the time and money I invested in them. I made valuable connections, received exclusive information, was forced to think and produce under pressure, take lots of notes... Don't miss out on opportunities like these. They are invaluable, and they can provide you with the knowledge you need to start and run a small business. Plus, when you get around groups of people who are motivated to follow their dreams, like you are, you start to feel a whole different energy from what you experience anywhere else.

Join a mastermind group. Energy. Information. Motivation. Accountability. Focus. Support. It's all there for you in a mastermind group full of winners. "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with", so choose your mastermind group wisely and let them help you set yourself up for success.

Get into personal development. I would not be writing this blog post right now without the art of personal development. I used to have a rather low opinion of it, thinking it was mostly just rhetorical philosophy. Jim Rohn, Dexter Yager, Zig Ziglar, Les Brown, Norman Vincent Peale, Dale Carnegie, Napoleon Hill, Earl Nightingale, Matthew Kelley and many, many others soon showed me that I was WRONG. Perhaps I'll write another post about it later. But plug yourself in! Get your hands on all the right books and audios (Ask me for recommendations). I myself subscribe to a bi-weekly education program that sends me four CD's and one new book to read every month. Seriously make time to consume these kinds of materials. It doesn't even matter if you can't put your full attention into them all the time (I, for example, usually listen to audios when I'm cleaning or driving, and I often read when I'm eating a meal). There are so many things to say about personal development, but what I want you to understand for now is that it's what's going to keep you going when things get confusing or rough. Never go a day without improving your mind through business and personal development materials.

Ask yourself, "Why do I want to do this?"Many people who start businesses seem to lose their way. How many businesses have you seen close over the years? It's probably because something broke their focus. You have to have a WHY. What's going to make it worth it for you to get up everyday and work on your business, through good times and bad? To weep over it, stress over it, bleed over it, get frustrated with it, push it, fix it, tweak it, win with it? I, for example, clean houses. I enjoy cleaning houses because I enjoy that sort of physical labor. I enjoy seeing how I can change the appearance of a home on the inside. I like knowing how clean I can make something. But cleaning houses is not something I can do long-term. In fact, I don't plan to be doing it for too much longer. But I started doing it because it was a great way to transition from the life I had (college student, 3 bosses) to the life I wanted (carefree with an awesome residual income). For the sake of my why, I have scrubbed many a toilet. It's all for my WHY.

One of my most recent revelations about business is that in order to be a good business person, you have to be a good consumer. Good business people like to see other business people succeed. I know other business owners, and it's awesome, because whenever I need something, I know who to go to! And they know to come to me when they need something. There's a give and take aspect to it. "The more you give, the more you get!" (Dexter Yager) If you support other people's businesses and open yourself up to being sold to, you might see other people treat you and your business in the same way. This is also a good way to put yourself in your customers' shoes and really find out how you can reach them.

I got the best advice from one of my personal development heroes, Earl Nightingale, over a year ago: "Don't compete: Create!" I heard it on an audio entitled "The Strangest Secret." You should go and listen to it right away; it's on YouTube. I heard Earl say it over and over again until it finally sank in. I live by that quote. Whenever you start to stress or you feel you've hit a dead end, just remember: "Don't compete: Create!"

Practical tips:

• Find a mentor!
• Get educated!
• Mastermind it out!
• Develop yourself!
• Define your purpose!
• Be a consumer!
• Don't compete: Create!

Mentor Moment: It's a Struggle!

"It's a struggle!"

Thus spoke a successful woman in the business of real estate, Toni, whom I had the pleasure of spending time with when she agreed to sit down with me and my mastermind group the other day. She dropped a lot of gems as she described her life to us, so this post about her may be the first of many.
She was a mother of two, suddenly single, twenty-odd years ago. She had a job she hated, and a desire to create a better life for herself and her sons.  She was working for the airlines when she faced the reality that she had to do something different; she had to escape the life of an under-paid, over-worked, mistreated employee. So, she jumped ship.

"Don't be afraid to go for a swim and struggle!"
She had to struggle to be independent of her parents. She had to struggle to provide food and education for her sons. She learned that:

"Life motivates you."

and she pointed out that

"When you have a choice, you're complacent."
Sometimes God asks us to struggle by showing us that we have no choice to do otherwise. He asks us to go down paths that we don't necessarily like. Toni said that she herself had hated the path she had to follow! But she had faith and she persevered. She says that when you are ready, and God is ready, a light bulb will go off, and you will know what you have to do. And you will struggle. But you'll know you're in the right struggle. The key, according to Toni, is to remember to

"Always focus on how life can always get better."

And then you'll look back someday, like Toni, and know that you'd struggled for reasons much bigger than you can presently imagine.